I moved to Delhi few months ago and began living with my family with minimal investment. I am on a temporary basis and not sure till when I would be here, hence did not feel the necessity to invest on comforts, hence I just stuck to bare minimums.
Things were smooth for first couple of months. Trouble started when I started entertaining my land lady out of courtesy. She began with suggestions that things need to be put in places(not that I throw them, but with no shelves in the house, I could not help it), floor to be cleaned, balcony to be washed etc. She offered me a couple of tables so that I can place my suitcases over it and the place would look less cluttered. I agreed. Then she offered a sofa and bed so that it would be comfortable and would look good even when I have guests. I accepted. This was followed by regular instructions on cleaning the sofa, putting the curtains, watering the plants and what not. She wants me to be a good wife with a house that has flower pots, clean floor, curtains, dustless sofa and uncluttered rooms.
I was sometimes agreeing, nodding, grunting, bitching and so on, then it suddenly occurred to me that this what was I have been doing for the past few years, in my job in the name of development. Our activities started in a village, suggest them couple of easy things. Then follows the actual , that they are poor, they do not know what to do, how to live, how to earn, how to manage etc. etc...and then giving innumerable suggestions on what to do and how to do. Poor chaps, they obliged to meet us whenever we visited them, whether during their meal or their field time or leisure and listen to all the non sense what we were telling them. Some of them actually did what we asked them to do
My landlady at least gave me tables, sofa and bed but what did we give them, just a few words and some of our time, not entirely out of empathy but also because it was our job. I never realized or cared to think if I was doing things from my perspective or theirs. Intentions were good, as good as my landlady's towards me, but then were they required, was it the way to be done...were we intervening or intruding.....
Things were smooth for first couple of months. Trouble started when I started entertaining my land lady out of courtesy. She began with suggestions that things need to be put in places(not that I throw them, but with no shelves in the house, I could not help it), floor to be cleaned, balcony to be washed etc. She offered me a couple of tables so that I can place my suitcases over it and the place would look less cluttered. I agreed. Then she offered a sofa and bed so that it would be comfortable and would look good even when I have guests. I accepted. This was followed by regular instructions on cleaning the sofa, putting the curtains, watering the plants and what not. She wants me to be a good wife with a house that has flower pots, clean floor, curtains, dustless sofa and uncluttered rooms.
I was sometimes agreeing, nodding, grunting, bitching and so on, then it suddenly occurred to me that this what was I have been doing for the past few years, in my job in the name of development. Our activities started in a village, suggest them couple of easy things. Then follows the actual , that they are poor, they do not know what to do, how to live, how to earn, how to manage etc. etc...and then giving innumerable suggestions on what to do and how to do. Poor chaps, they obliged to meet us whenever we visited them, whether during their meal or their field time or leisure and listen to all the non sense what we were telling them. Some of them actually did what we asked them to do
My landlady at least gave me tables, sofa and bed but what did we give them, just a few words and some of our time, not entirely out of empathy but also because it was our job. I never realized or cared to think if I was doing things from my perspective or theirs. Intentions were good, as good as my landlady's towards me, but then were they required, was it the way to be done...were we intervening or intruding.....
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